THE CHILDREN’S BREAD
25th. November 2023
“Child of God, there is no length of time in a spiritual or physical prison that would equate for just a day of freedom. Therefore, if you are really hungry and determined to get your freedom from Satan, then, there is absolutely nothing you wouldn’t endure just for it.
Be set free in God Almighty through Christ, amen!”
– Sister Susan –
DIVORCING – BUT STILL LIVING TOGETHER?
I really applaud people who find themselves under this category and are still able to maintain their godliness and sanity, though in many cases, it could be very challenging. As it relates to all who are involved, the truth is, that living together during the process of divorce is one of the most difficult things to go through.
Child of God, if this is your situation, then, while going through your divorce or waiting for the court to finalize it, I would not stop to re-iterate, that there are still certain rules of engagement which we must abide by when living together within the same house with an ex-spouse. Why am I still talking about this issue which if I had my way, I would rather not even want to talk about or make public? Well, it is partially to encourage someone, strengthen someone else, and for another, to tell you, that you are not alone, and that you are still a child of God, whom He deeply loves, thus, I want you to encourage yourself in the LORD GOD. I believe that a word or two could sooth the soul or emotions of someone out there, even if it is just one man or woman, who might find themselves in such a situation contrary to their will and expectations. Since it is already a very trying situation, therefore, if both, or one of you find it difficult for diverse reasons to move out as soon as possible, then, there are things you might need to look into in order to alleviate the difficulties which getting divorce already brings.
NEVER SAY NEVER
As a follower of Christ, it is bad enough having to get a divorce, and especially where there in no more hope or expectation, either from the two individuals involved, or from one of them for reconciliation of the marriage. Therefore, still living together under the same roof can be very challenging, as well as one of the most tormenting feelings ever, and such, that I would not want to wish on another child of God, which further confirms my convictions about what I have learned for some years now as it relates to the condition, which I see anyone struggling with, and that is this: Don’t you say, Never! Child of God, never say, that this or that would never happen to you. Never say: What that brother or sister is going through, is something which I would never experience or go through. However, if you make the mistake by saying such, then, in your quite moment, ask God for forgiveness and help, and ask HIM to help you not to find yourself in such a situation similar to that, which the person you are observing might be going through. We only pray it doesn’t happen to us, and warn others about the impending danger of taking a particular route, or living a particular kind of lifestyle, that could lead them to end up in a certain situation which could be unfavorable. That notwithstanding, we must also acknowledge, that there are situations and circumstances beyond our human control and regardless of what we do, or how hard we are able to pray, there are just certain things which can’t be prayed away but must come to pass, thus, we have to go through them, by fastening our seat-belts as though we were in a plane, which has come into a serous storm and has to fly through it, nonetheless! As a result, we fasten our spiritual seat-belts, by wearing our Godly armor through faith in God’s faithfulness, and go through such storms, which could be equivalent with going through the valley of the shadow of death; bad seasons, situations, challenges! Therewith, as long as we are genuine children of God, when all is said and done, it will end up for HIS glory, and for our good, and this remains the truth, even in situations where it might not seem so, nor make sense to us at that particular point in time.
Child of God, we pray for people who are struggling with things which we cannot understand. We encourage them in any way we can, and we must try the best we can not to engage in shaming them, or further pushing them away from God Almighty, especially if we know that they truly belong to God. We rebuke them where we must, but in such a way that they understand that they can do better, be better and overcome, and while doing that, we ought to be mindful not to say or believe, that we, who are correcting them, would never do such a thing, or become such a thing without the help of God Almighty. I have been found wanting here on a couple of occasions, if I may be granted the privilege of being a bit transparent about where I became a victim to one of the very things I boldly said, that I would never become:
Till about a decade ago, I used to tell people in regards to everything which they would tell me about as things which they were struggling with, that such struggles were too minute for them not to easily overcome and I would always say that to them, not because I wanted to undermine them, but rather because I truly believed in what I said. I remember always being confident with how naturally slim I was and how I would never add any weight regardless of how much I would eat because till that particular point in time it was the fact! I could remember always being asked if I was on diet or on regular sports, and I would always tell the truth: NO! I even told someone some years ago that the reason why I added some weight was because I had just given birth to my youngest child, and had been more indoors than out and about, which was the truth, telling her that the moment I was done with that phase, and got busy again, that like the usual thing for me after giving birth, would be to easily shed the weight which I had gained during pregnancy, and this truth about me was one which the acquaintance with whom I was having that particular conversation was not a stranger to; that shedding weight again, was going to be a baby-play. This conversation which I had with her, and the answer which I gave to her, were based on the fact that I was being reminded that I had added much weight, thus, being mindful of how I answered as not to hurt her feelings, since she was not as privileged as I was way back in the day as it relates to naturally being slim and also shedding weight. Thus, I was not speaking to undermine her, but rather telling her not to worry about me in that area as I wanted to take my time after child birth.
Now this particular incident which I just spoke about as it relates to me talking about losing weight naturally back in the day, has nothing to do with anyone I would be writing about in this particular devotional, therefore, child of God, don’t speculate. Anyway, truth be told, from thence, I lost the battle against naturally losing weight and being slim, or so it seemed. I would go from one situation to the other, which kept me grounded, either indoors or in unhealthy eating habits, and regardless of what I did, I just couldn’t lose weight as naturally as I had always done. As a result, it taught me the very important lesson, though one out of many, that there comes a time that certain things, which one had always taken for granted might become too difficult to hold unto, and for this reason, I learned not to take the blessings of God which comes in a seemingly easy way for granted, but rather, to truly appreciate them, e.g. I appreciate the gift of life, gifts of God, relationship with our Holy God, good friends, second chances for good things in life, loving trustworthy people, and every little miracle, just to mention but a few.
Therefore, while still living together with your ex-partner under one roof, we ought to be mindful of the following few things out of many others, which I might not go into for now, but some other time, of course:
- Emotions are already very high or fragile, both sides. Therefore, try the best you can, to avoid conflicts, although, sometimes it might be very difficult as it is easier said than done, especially when the advice is coming from third parties and those who do not have the challenges like some, who are going through such situations may have.
- If you have not already begun, then, it is time for you to begin to plan to move out, should the other one be unwilling to do so. If you are like me and live in the kind of nation where I live, it could be very challenging because of the issues with housing in recent times, especially if you have limited financial resources, but still want to find a good accommodation befitting a person moving in with children. Thus, it might take longer than anticipated to find a place to move into, therefore, patience is always required while searching for an accommodation. All these things would eventually be achieved as long as you are on it, but it will only require more time – Patience. Don’t forget, that there is no one who wants the space, more urgent, than the one who wants out of the relationship. Therefore, child of God, if you find yourself in such a position, don’t be hard on yourself, do what you can, in order to take care of your peace.
- As best as you can, keep up your boundaries within the house, but make sure you are determined to move out and seriously searching for a conducive place to move into, in order to minimize the frictions which is inevitable due to living together, yet, fully aware that you are no longer together and will never again become “one” like you once were, should that be your situation, which I hope for you, is not the case.
- DON’T!!! This particular one is very high on my list of a “NO-GO!” – Don’t even think about it! Don’t bring love interests or a potential future spouse into the house, while both of you are still living together under the same roof as it might open a vault of darkness into your life and those of your children, depending on how the other ex-partner involved, functions, as they might seek to get even with you, by bringing in multiple girlfriends /boyfriends into the house on a daily basis to terrorize, trigger, and offend you, citing, that after-all, you did it first. Thus, this would be further traumatizing for the very one who is willing to leave, but due to diverse reasons, has not yet been able to do so as fast as they might actually want to. Besides, regardless of who was wrong or right; whose fault it was that brought the marriage to an end, it is still required of you not to de-humanize the other person, despite how they would have behaved should the reverse have been the case, this is so because for those of us who are followers of Christ, these are the things we are required to do.
It is sad enough, that a marriage should come to an end, therefore, anything that we must do that would help to minimize the drama that mostly follows, the moment marriages come to an end, then, that is what is advisable for us to do, and sometimes, living together during such phase truly delays the speedy and complete process of forgiveness and healing. That notwithstanding, what do you do when it cannot go as fast as you would have loved it to? Absolutely nothing, therefore, wait it out, while praying against the plans of the enemy, who through different means, people and things, or situations, would want to destroy you for wanting to go contrary to his plans for your life. As a result, or in such situations, till you settle the issue with accommodation, you would have to meet with special ones; friends, etc., outside the house that you are still sharing together.
Someone recently told me, “You don’t even know how to divorce, you are going about it in an un-planned manner!”
This statement got me thinking, and replying, but within myself,
“You are absolutely right, but that is because I have never divorced before. I have never been at a round-table or a locker-room conversations of those who divorce for fun or planned theirs ahead of time, thus, I never planned for one, neither do I have any one giving me counsel on a daily basis on what to do, or how to go about it the rogue way, which some people would opt for, in order to get it over and done with, faster than I am going about it, which in some cases as it relates to situations where there is danger to life, is necessary if nothing else is helping, and in my opinion, such shouldn’t be considered as a crime”
Consequently, something always has to give! All I know and I am appreciative to God Almighty for is that, although I do not choose to take the rogue, or evil way to get a divorce, I would still get it regardless of how many more months it takes. At the end of the day, it is for the two human beings who are no longer united as to the direction they are on, to finally move on with their lives, in whichever way God permits them to.
With that said, I have also read about and heard of people who lived together while going through the process of divorce, yet, they were completely detached from each other emotionally, financially and otherwise, thus, they give each other access to live as they want, give access to whom they want, have romantic relationships with whom they want, and have sleep overs etc. and when I hear that, I sigh, thinking to myself: How wonderful would my life have been or be, if I, for once would just let go, to completely do what everyone who knows me and hears about it would say, “We knew she was off, but not to this extent!” I mean, how cool would it be for the freedom of my “carnal self,” if I decide to call the bluff of everything and everyone, including God Almighty, and just do that, which I myself would have to look back on and say: You – Susan, definitely didn’t do that!
Child of God, we are bound by God Almighty to a certain code of conduct, even when it hurts, or when it seems from a human perspective, that it could be to our disadvantage, but that is just who we are, and yes, despite that, we hold unto the promise, goodness and favor of God Almighty to us, so dearly and wouldn’t want to miss out on the good things of life which HE has for us. Therefore, the access which God Almighty permits us to give as well as the one HE also permits us to receive, is sure. That notwithstanding, it must be according to the rules of Godly engagement, to the glory of God Almighty, for the protection and vindication of our Godly reputation should the enemy, who is ever ready and vigilant bring a railing accusation against us – Selah.
A SISTER IN-LAW
Child of God, you see, early this year, a sister in-law from my Ex-husband’s side, who used to equally go by my native name which everyone used to call me before she came into the family, the wife to his youngest brother, and who just got married and also came to Germany only a decade ago, died in another city, some hours drive to where we live. She was still very young, and left behind very little children. When news of her demise came to me, which was the very day she passed on, and also a day or two after I had published my monthly devotional, titled, “THE GOD OF GOOD NEWS,” I initially didn’t know what to make of it. Although, till date, I have not reached out to sympathize, for reasons which would never be understood by 98,99999% of Christians out there, yet, I was saddened about the news and prayed for her husband, children and family whom she left behind. Thinking about her demise, I came to the conclusion, that based on the things I am spiritually privy to, that all the money, or doctors in the world could not have saved her life, and that there is truly more to life than meets the eye. There are places, situations and marriages you just don’t walk into like that, and decide to stroll out of any how and whenever, but rather, you must have to follow the timing, wisdom and directives of the Holy Spirit should you want to come out alive and whole. For such reasons, I keep saying, that everyone’s battle is different, therefore, should not be compared to that of another. There are those who fall down from a bicycle and die as a result, while there are those who get into a should-be fatal car crash, where their vehicles are completely demolished, yet, they get out of it with little or nothing to show that it even ever happened. Thus, people are different, and battles are different. Sometimes, I feel like telling the LORD to unleash just few, out of very many powers who are after me, to certain mean people, just for a day, and let’s see how they would fare afterwards, but then, I would pause to think to myself, “What would it really benefit me, to see a person laying helpless in death on the ground, and no longer able to huff and puff, or even confess, that it was all unnecessary? Absolutely Nothing!” Consequently, regardless of how offended I might be with a wicked person, and regardless of what I might have said in my moments of disappointment in them, I do not engage in such ungodly desires against God’s children who are off, as my prayers are for them to come back to the fullness of who they truly are in God Almighty – Children of God!
DEPENDING ON WHO YOU ARE – DEATH CAN BE GOOD OR BAD NEWS.
Having said that, I would like to re-iterate, that for those who are genuine children of God; who have submitted themselves to God Almighty through Christ – The Way, Truth, and the Life, death at any time is never a punishment, and never a sad news, despite how saddened we are whenever anyone departs this world. Nonetheless, death, only becomes an unbearable sad news if the deceased had made THE ULTIMATE EVIL CHOICE, as such death is indeed a punishment for those who died unsaved, those who were unrepentant, persistent and rebellious in evil. Hence, It becomes that which is to be dreaded by those, who for whatever reason, willingly and un-repentantly submit themselves to Satan and his dark kingdom! Due to the fact that such individuals had chosen to eternally turn their backs to God Almighty, the Creator of Heaven and earth and the One who created all spirits, including them, such death, should indeed be one of deep sorrow and profound mourning.
NOTE: Child of God, in case, and I repeat, just in case, that I do not publish monthly devotional for the first of December 2023, I just want you not to forget, that for this month, November, you precious child of God Almighty, have been very well fed! You cannot complain that Sister Susan did not, or has not fed you with enough children’s bread to sustain you till 2024! You see, sometimes, I just have to chill and think about how good God has been to me thus far 😊; counting my many little and big miracles or blessings, which money cannot buy, naming them all, one by one. Hmmm… Child of GOD, you might not understand, absolutely not, not even if you were told – God truly loves me! Yes, He did not only first, but also genuinely loved US ALL, who continue to remain faithful to HIM, despite our little faith and strength, and for this very reason, we must love HIM back!
Child of God, be happy and stay blessed.
Jesus loves you!
Yours sister – Susan.